25 to Life
January 24,2006 -

Eidos Interactive knows exactly what demographic they want to appeal to with their latest action-adventure, 25 to Life. Every rap-blasting, violent game-playing male that loves Grand Theft Auto, or Pacino’s Scarface—you are the main target for this gangsta style shoot ‘em up. When any game is targeted for a narrow audience, it often ends up one way. Here’s a hint: it starts with S and ends with ucky.

The story starts out focused on a gangsta named Freeze, who wants out of “the game” for good. An antagonist calls Freeze and demands that he do “one last job” before he can officially be finished with his gangsterly duties. Of course, the job turns into a complete nightmare, propelling Freeze into a firefight for his life. Later in the game, you will take on the role of a cop who has many problems of his own. Dirty cops, organized crime, and are all involved, but getting lost in the shifting plot is all too easy. It is not that the plot is complex—it’s just that it desperately jumps around in an attempt to keep the characters connected.

The single-player game consists of missions that revolve around one thing, and that is shooting people; you shoot lots and lots of people. Raising the body count is no problem given the amount of enemies on any particular level. Cops will be wandering the streets like lost sheep waiting to be slaughtered. Your cop killing ways are also helped along by the variety of weapons strewn about. There are plenty of automatics at your disposal as well as snipers, handguns and melee weapons. None of the weapons really distinguishes themselves from the group. Each automatic behaves like most of the other automatics and the melee weapons lack punch. Furthermore, the sniper rifle is a complete waste of time. While it does kill enemies in one shot (most of the time) the zoom is only about 5x, which is pathetic.

Enemy AI is also pretty inadequate. Enemies will do one of three things. First choice: they will stand still and point their gun where they know you are hiding, until you peek around the corner. Then, they will blast you away like Rambo in a rice patty. Second choice: they will stand in one spot until you sneak up behind them and hit them with a tire iron. Third choice: they spawn eyes in the back of their heads and start shooting at you before you even know what’s going down. Regardless of which choice the AI goes with, you are guaranteed to be cursing at the television.

If you can withstand the obscene AI for more than a few missions, you will find that you are unlocking items as you move along. These items are used to customize your character for the multiplayer arena. Everything from do-rags to new kicks (that would be “shoes” for you non-gangstas) can be unlocked and thrown onto your avatar. All the customizing you do will show up online, so you can flaunt your creativity, or lack thereof.

Once you get your character all dolled up, you are ready to hit the online streets with your guns blazin’. The online portion of the game will look instantly familiar to fans of the Socom series. However, even though the aesthetics of the game are comparable, that is where the similarity ends. While Socom requires tactics and strategy, 25 to Life requires nothing but a weapon and a gung-ho attitude. The simplicity of it all makes the experience very shallow in comparison to other games. However, if there is any fun to be had with this game, it will be found online.

Graphically, the game is just plain old ugly. The levels are bland and offer little to no variety, and the character models are just as boring. Freeze looks like a generic version of C.J. Johnson from San Andreas, and all the cops look like the same three models. The animations are also substandard. Players look stiff, and the wannabe rag doll physics don’t do much to help. Overall, the game seems poorly planned, as well as poorly executed.

The sound department is the place that actually deserves a little (actually, more like minuscule) praise. Neither for the spectacular gun sounds (because they don’t exist), nor for the fantastic voice acting (because, here’s a shock, that doesn’t exist either), but for the solid soundtrack. The game employs a variety of old school style hip-hop and newer rap, which fits the mood of the game pretty well. The Xbox and PS2 versions of the game come packaged with a CD sampler of the game’s music. This would be a great addition to a lackluster package, but for some reason, all the best songs are missing from said soundtrack. Instead of getting the best, like Public Enemy, you get the worst, like Pook Diesel (No that is not a type-o, it really says Pook).

In the end, there is not much to say in 25 to life’s favor. Sure, there are people out there who will have fun playing the game online, but there is little else to do here. The boring graphics, the (mostly) garbage sound, and the obscenely boring story will leave you in a non-marijuana induced daze.

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